Star Bucket shower

Almost 6 months here and I haven’t even been possessed by an evil spirit or daemon. I haven’t seen a ghost either. I think most Ghanaians would not believe me, as this happens to them all the time apparently. Also, I haven’t eaten the local delicacy, grass cutter. That is a rat indeed, thank you. Plus I haven’t taken a bucket shower. So much for integration.

And now I’m off to the US, planning to fully integrate in the life of a New Yorker. I will go for runs at the Hudson riverside and Central Park. I’m going to hit the jazz clubs, salad bars and delicious sushi places, go to museums at 10 o’clock at night and stay awake 24 hours if possible. Thanks to homeexchange.com we even got our own little apartment in the Big Apple. Hopefully the guy who will stay at our place is not too psycho. After all, I have been assured that evil spirits and daemons do exist.

Second half of this year though, when I get back, I plan to take a bucket shower and integrate a bit more in the non-expat life of Ghana. I think it’s time to get off my big African booty (I’m getting compliments lately, for real, not too sure whether I like it or not). Sometimes I feel I’m completed isolated in my AC cold little world from reality. Although the daily power cuts and water shortages remind me of the life outside my house, car and office. Maybe a bite of a tiny tiny little rat to start with will help. But please don’t send me bad vibes by some kind of scary voodoo witch if I don’t keep this promise.

Goodbye to my best friends

For the past months I have seen them almost every day. I have been so engaged in their lives, I can’t even imagine living without them anymore. They are my friends and I will miss them so much. It’s really unfair, and I wasn’t prepared at all, even though I knew that eventually they would leave me alone here.

I want to know what is going on, how they are doing, how the kids are doing. And most of all, I want to know how Adam is doing after all what happened. And will Karen and David stay together? And how about Jenny and Pete? I really hope Jo is happy in Australia.

Some of you might think that in this time of emailing and cheap phone calls staying in touch is not too difficult. But it is though. And I’m sure that others felt the same way as I do now. The others that have been friends with them as well. Please tell me I will get over it. And please tell me there will new episodes of Cold Feet. I’m grieving and staying in bed today.

Story of a Sinner

For someone who comes from a family that has not been to church for the past 3 generations at least, Ghana can be a bit difficult. I think even before those 3 generations, some of my ancestors might have been either communists, - also not very known for their spiritual interests- or a drunk whose job it was to light the street lights in the evening. Or so I heard. But that particular great great grandfather doesn’t sound like a regular in church either. (by the way, I come from a very sophisticated background as you can see)

Anyhow, for a sinner like me, understanding ‘fun’ in Ghana can be complicated. Fun is not dancing with your friends, going out for beers or parties, going away for weekends at the beach or hiking in the mountains. Fun is going to church. If you are lucky for at least 4 hours. And fun is going to funerals. Which basically means lots of food for free. I have been invited many times already to go to church though, and I’m actually quite tempted to wake up early one Sunday morning. My colleague really wants me to go to Ghana International Gospel Church with him. That sounds like it might be even a little bit of fun. I swear to God, I will go once I have a confession to make.

No need for google translation today

Since a few months I am the proud Owner of A Car. I am so proud that if I were a man you’d say the car compensates the length of my penis. But for a woman that is a bit of a weird thing to say. And besides, I wouldn’t know what I should be compensating in length, although in fact I would love legs like Julia Roberts.

Anyhow, all I want to say really is that I’m very happy with it. I even plan to post a picture of the thing on this blog sometime soon. Although most people I know own cars and they might think it’s not so special after all. But these people certainly don’t have the nice overview on the road like in my car. Or perhaps they don’t have an ipod thingy in their radio. Or electric role down windows or a functioning AC which are life saving gadgets here on the equator. Since a few weeks I know on which side of the car I can find the fuel tank. Honestly, that took me quite a while, but at least now I know how to park it at the filling station.

Besides how to park a car, I found out some other interesting stuff lately. Apparently people in the north of Ghana think one breast is full of milk and the other one is full of water. That’s why sometimes they give their babies tea. Other intersting phenomenon has been that today my colleagues forced me to dance to a 15 minutes song about how I love the Lord and praise him. Never thought I would do that. And last extraordinary event of today is that my friend Sofie who moves back to Danmark in a few months just cleaned her house herself for the first time in 3 years. She is trying to pre-integrate into Danish society and adjusting to no cook, no maid, no gardener, no driver and no personal trainer. If I were her I’d reconsider.

Walk like an Egyptian Part 2

Walk like an Egyptian

Veel nieuwe dingen geleerd afgelopen dagen, bijvoorbeeld: Je hebt ook dieren mummies. Piramides zijn echt veel groter dan je denkt. Binnen in een piramide ruikt het naar pies. Egyptische taxichauffeurs kennen het hele Nederlands elftal van 1988 uit hun hoofd. Hoe groter de donkere stip op het voorhoofd van de mannen van het vele bidden hoe eikeligere types het zijn. Je schijnt ook stiften te kunnen kopen om zo’n stip op je voorhoofd te maken.

Als je in Cairo woont, rook je ongewild een pakje per dag aan uitlaatgassen en echte sigarettenrook. Waterpijpen ruiken daarentegen naar bloemetjes. Alleen rijke, hoog opgeleide vrouwen dragen geen hoofddoek. Burka’s zijn best in de mode in Egypte. Lamsvlees +aubergine+knoflook+limoen+tahina =overheerlijk.

En verder ook nog wat over mezelf geleerd, bijvoorbeeld: Er zit een limiet aan de hoeveelheid keer dat ik me totaal van top tot teen wil bedekken in een verplichte geleende soepjurk om een moskee te bezoeken. Het voelt toch raar, een beetje akelig en oneerlijk om je zo te moeten verstoppen en opeens had ik er geen zin meer in. Ik kan best goed Arabisch lezen, spreken kan ik alleen nog voor geen meter. Na Egypte voelt Ghana als ‘thuis’.

Foto's komen morgen, als internet het weer beter doet. In Sh'Allah.

Troonrede

State of the Nation speech, soort troonrede, was geestig dit jaar.

Na mooie woorden over de economie, de olie, de zielige homeless die huizen moeten krijgen, de corruptie en het aantal moorden in het land eindigde deze speech met de volgende woorden van His Excellency John Evans Atta Mills, President of the Republic of Ghana: (denk er voor de grap Beatrix in een mooie jurk en hoed bij die zoiets zou zeggen)

Finally, Madam Speaker, a personal concern.

The "Better Ghana" that we long to achieve cannot be reached without self-discipline in every aspect of our lives: at work, in the office, on the road, in the market place, at the lorry station and above all in our attitude to time!

My addiction to time consciousness is very well known. (Hoera, ik ben dus toch niet de enige hier!) And this year, I will expect this same "addiction" from Ministers and Officials of State.

I expect all Ministers and other Officials to be punctual to functions to which they are invited. (anderhalf uur is geen uitzondering tenslotte)

I want organisers of such functions to draw the attention of the Presidency to Ministers and Officials who become notorious late comers.

Of course those who invite public officials also have a responsibility to stick to time while at the same time shortening their programmes in the interest of time management.

And discipline on the road is also desperately needed. The carnage on the roads, largely avoidable, the loss of dear ones, not only takes a human toll, but also has serious economic consequences.(dagelijks zie je weer vrachtwagens dubbelgevouwen in de berm liggen)

I am charging the Police Service to submit within the shortest possible time a blueprint for a drastic reduction in road accidents.

But discipline, Madam Speaker, can only come from the inner person.

It is each of us therefore in this House today, who bear the responsibility for setting a clear and visible example to our fellow citizens. It is my hope therefore that our lawmakers will be committed apostles of time consciousness as we progress on the path to building a Better Ghana.

Madam Speaker, I thank you for the opportunity and your attention and may God continue to Bless our homeland Ghana and make us greater and stronger!

:-)