In the category of 'wow is this my life? and 'only in Africa' I found myself learning all about birth and delivery today in the UNDP office. Yes, you read that right. In the office, so with colleagues. My dear friend C is leaving Ghana tonight to go deliver her baby in Canada, but not before her female colleagues had thrown her a surprise baby shower. And surprising it was.
Where normally people here get already all giggly by even the slightest suggestion of sex and are uncomfortable seeing a little glimpse of underwear peaking over your pants, today we openly discussed all there is to know. Men were ordered to leave the room and about 25 women gathered in a circle. And while friend C's face was getting paler every minute, the UN nurse took us carefully through all the steps.
She started off with saying that sex during pregnancy was fine, as it was ok to 'water the tree a little' now and then. (husband D, the only man who -as an exception- was allowed to stay in the room was still laughing at this point). But as the nurse went on with detailed descriptions of what happens when you push too much, scissors and other vivid characteristics of contractions and labour, he also started to look as if he had put too much baby powder on his face.
The nurse concluded her advise with saying that after delivery friend C would love her own mother even more, but that it will all be fine and she will earn the honorable title of Mother that 'you just won't get for nothing'. Then it was time for presents, some fried chicken and hugs. And I realised that's how they do it here. No doctors, no special yoga classes, no million books on what to expect when you are expecting. Just a group of women with experience introducing young women into the secret society of those women who have already done it.
Friend C did not hear anything she didn't know yet as her iphone gives her all the details she needs, but the attempt was very sweet. And she will have the best of both worlds, going home now to the comforting luxury of good hospitals and healthcare. But I wonder when the time is there whether she will also think about the lovely advises from her African sisters.
